NEW BEER IS WICCAN-PHOBIC

Francisco Goya's depiction of witches going to a Sabbath
Francisco Goya's depiction of witches going to a Sabbath

I was astonished that HollywoodOutbreak didn’t have a Halloween story yet.

Well, just as we were about to pick the bones (no pun) of a Vampire angle to Randy (Quaid) and (wife) Edi‘s actor-whacker yarn, Witch’s Wit Beer rescued us with both a seasonal and controversial story worthy of our intelligent, sensitive readers.

The nation’s Wiccan community (a neopagan ‘witchcraft’ religion), although small in number they have grown long shadows into deep pockets and want it known that much has changed in the thousand years since witches were burned at the stake.

Humorists are running out of people/ideologies to humiliate.  Marie Clare (magazine) got her pretty head handed to her for thinking that it was still funny (and PC-acceptable) to savage the plus-sized.  So that leaves only certain religious and political targets (ID’d by American aristocrats who give us their cues) remaining in the media free fire zone.

It’s not that this beer controversy has no merit; there is, after all a woman (a witch to be precise) getting incinerated at a medieval stake while the god-fearing witness.

That alone is worthy of complaint, but the 175-word story on the reverse of the screaming victim give all witches, bad and good (vis-à-vis Bell, Book and Candle) a bad rap.

To be fair (or not) Port Brewing Company of San Marcos, California (where else?) has a variety of themed brew brands, including  The Inferno ale, with a morality tale regarding Hell on its back label.

But it’s only Witch’s Wit that has given the beer’s shareholders the blessing of international publicity and the curse of PC animus.

Persecution of witches
Persecution of witches

Meanwhile, some Women’s Studies professor with more degrees than a thermometer was quoted as saying that the label was offensive and was “perpetuating misogyny.”

If you can’t get traction with the witch angle then throw in women-hating. The usual (and unusual) suspects smell blood and are promising more generic smear-words.

But the brewery co-owners might use their new fame better for a change-the-label contest.  Hideous torture satire was done best by the old National Lampoon magazine, not retail shelf products.  Don’t back down, but stand back, listen and actually have a dialog that might result in something less offensive.

It will be “offensive” to me (in the soon-to-be-here future) when I get hung, drawn and quartered, not for witchy images on a beer bottle, but for what someone said (they thought) I was thinking.

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